Dreaming our dreams

Alex and I were talking about our life together a couple of nights ago. The great thing about the two of us being together is that we compliment each other so well. She is always grateful for what she has, while I normally see the things to improve. During our talk, I said that I would have done this entire New York adventure different if I could go back and live it again. The picture that I painted for her was blissful and happy, yet simple and quaint. I told her that we would be living in Bainbridge or some other island, secluded from the city (Alex is a city girl and I am not sure she would even appreciate the “rural” aspect of this dream, though I thirst for small towns). We would take the ferry to work, for me it would be school, and convince my sister’s family to live there with us. I would be enrolled at UW, either as a graduate student or going through their advanced education program in publishing, and work twenty to thirty hours a week at some restaurant. We would be thinking about having kids, or already have one, and we would be content.

Once I was done relying my dream, Alex told me that everything was perfect: the time and place were ideal. She would not change a thing about how we have advanced on our dreams. I have been mulling this idea over and over in my head, and I have to say that I agree with her. What I saw might not be what should have been our past, but rather what could be our future. Being in New York away from everyone has challenged us in ways that probably would have never happened if it weren’t for the strain of being in a new city, alone from everything and everyone familiar. I am learning to love her better by being more patient and physically loving towards her than I was in the past. Alex is learning that it is important to me that she stays physically fit so she can live a long, beautiful, and productive life. So, my wife was right: this was the ideal time to move.

Now on to the moping section of this blog.

If it weren’t for Alex, my life would be disparaging. I work at a job that I hate where I am required to up sell coffee. “A venti is only twenty cents more,” type of garbage. I don’t want to sound too good for my work, because I think that, since Christ humbled himself by coming into human existence, I should not be so proud of my abilities. Consequently, I pray everyday for patience, courage, and humility. Waiting for God to direct me, I am adrift. I am certain that God called me here, though I am currently clueless and hopeless about finding a good job where I can use the talents God gave me. There are only two options for me right now: I am either to learn that God has everything under control and I should just wait for Him to move me in any direction or I am supposed to continue sending my resume and cover letter to potential employers. Since I have not heard back from any of my endeavors so far, I am inclined to believe that God wants me to build community and patience in Him. However, I do not want to avoid getting my hands dirty. The one thing that I know for certain is that I am going to speak with my store manager about transferring to book side. We’ll see what happens.

I appreciate everybody’s prayers as Alex and I learn things about each other and this world.

HIGHLIGHTS OF OUR LIFE THIS PAST MONTH:
The door and kitchen were painted (it turned out looking good)
Alex has read more since we moved than me—she’s a maniac
We celebrated our first holiday alone—a bittersweet event
We created a budget for the month of July
I received a thank you letter from my store manager
Alex and I began running together
Alex and I are more in love than ever
Evan Hernandez is temporarily living in New York—a pleasant turn of events
We saw Star Trek and Transformers in the theatre
We enjoy the park almost everyday

A post abruptly ended

Life evolves ever so slight, making it difficult to write about the events in the Kelly house, at least it seems to me. Anyway, there have been a number of things to write about, so I will give you the highlights. Alex and I are attending church at Park Slope Presbyterian, a quaint church about 20 blocks from our apartment (the morning service is only four blocks away, but, because of our schedules, we attend evening service at a different location). The congregants are pleasant and welcoming. The sermons are lightly spoken, a difference that makes me miss Mars Hill, though heavy in content. The services remind me of the Catholic church that my family attended while I was maturing as a young adult and Christian, which is a fond memory. The tone of the pastor is not what Alex and I are accustomed to, so it’s difficult from time to time to keep up and be energetic about the message, which has been good thus far. What really brings us to the church every week is that it is a community of believers who care about each other. We are looking for a family here in New York, and I think we have a family in Christ. Praise God that most of the people who attend are young professionals and many of them have connections in publishing and photography.

My work is exhausting. I don’t want to sound like a crybaby, but I am tired. I am sick of working jobs where I don’t care about anything. I want something where I can be excited from time to time about my work. I don’t need to work in publishing, especially at this juncture in my life, though it would be great; what I do desire more than anything is to do something that is worthwhile, and important—a word that normally means changing the world, though I mean it as aiding a small populace in a meaningful way. The other day, m…

Sorry, I didn’t finish this entry, but I thought I should post it anyway.